


Saved

by riversdamsel



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: F/M, doctor who - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-02-02
Updated: 2012-02-12
Packaged: 2017-10-30 12:00:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,720
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/331529
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/riversdamsel/pseuds/riversdamsel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The TARDIS takes the Doctor back to The Library.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

The Doctor sat in the jump seat of the console room; the gentle hum of the TARDIS being the only thing that broke the otherwise deafening silence that surrounded him. He was alone yet again, just a madman and his box. He was never in the best of moods after leaving a companion, but this time it was much worse. She was not just a companion and he hadn't left her; time had caught up with them and now it was all over. He laughed bitterly at the thought; he had always said that time was not the boss of him; never had he been more wrong.

They travelled in opposite directions; the first time he met her she died for him and after that she became younger every time they met, minus the few blissful times when they were allowed to cross their own time streams or when they travelled linear, even if it was only for little while. But now it was over for him and he would never see her again- River Song, Melody Pond, his wife.

When he took companions with him he always knew they would be temporary and once they had left he'd have the TARDIS hide or delete their rooms along with all of their possessions, but he couldn't do that with River. Everything was exactly as it had been the last time he saw her, the last time he'd ever see her- the night the towers sang. There were still a few items of her clothing hanging in his wardrobe, a tube of red lipstick lying on his dresser and a pair of precariously high red heels by the TARDIS doors that she was expecting to retrieve upon returning from her expedition in The Library. He needed these small reminders of her surrounding him; he was afraid that he'd start to forget the way she swayed her hips when she walked, the flirtatious smile that so often played across her lips or what it felt like to just hold her in his arms. The memories of her would fade and then he would have nothing.

He ran his fingers absently through his floppy hair and slowly got to his feet. He placed his hands on the TARDIS console, silently willing her to take him where he needed to be, to River. It didn't surprise him when nothing happened; their time was over, but he just hadn't accepted it.

Suddenly a lever was thrown and the TARDIS lurched as she began to move on her own. As soon as he heard the familiar sound of the TARDIS landing he jumped over the stairs, flew to the doors and threw them open. His face fell when he saw what awaited him on the other side of those blue doors- The Library.

He had grown to despise libraries, but none more than this one. He stepped out of the TARDIS, hands shoved in his pockets. The only sound was the soft echo of his footsteps as he made his way across the room, his eyes cast downward to avoid looking at the chair that was connected to the data core. He smiled sadly and looked up as the node turned around and smiled at him.

"Hello Cal."

"Hello Doctor. Been waiting on you to show back up…but I'm not the only one, am I?"

Cal's words were surprisingly sharp to him even though they were spoken with a childlike innocence.

"So, Doctor, what are you doing here after all this time?"

All this time? He fleetingly wondered how long it had been since his first visit.

He absent-mindedly straightened his tweed jacket and glanced around the room before settling his eyes back on the node. "I'm here to save her." The question annoyed him slightly. Why else would he be here?

Cal smiled an almost mocking smile that caught the Doctor off guard once again. "She is saved, Doctor."

When the Doctor only regarded her with a look skepticism she simply asked, "Why don't you see for yourself?"

His look changed from uncertainty to questioning but the only response he got was that same smile, then there was flash of blinding light and he found himself standing on the greenest grass he's ever seen. He was in the data core. How was that even possible? He swiveled on the balls of his feet, taking in his surroundings. All questions of how he was there flew out of his mind when he saw a mess of curly blonde hair on the opposite side of the playground that he was facing. He felt his hearts skip a beat, it was her. River,  _his_  River.

He took a step towards her but froze in his tracks when a man walked up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. He felt his hearts drop when he saw her lean into the stranger's embrace and laugh her melodic laugh when he pressed soft kisses to her neck. She turned in his arms and whispered something in the man's ear that the Doctor couldn't hear. A blush spread across the man's face and River laughed, the flirtatious smile that the Doctor was so used to seeing directed towards him gracing her face.

She turned her head in his direction and caught his gaze, her smile fading. What he saw in her eyes, or rather what he didn't see, nearly killed him- not a single trace of recognition was there.

For some reason, River was unable to pull her gaze from the strange man who watched her so intently. She flashes him a small smile, the kind you give to people you pass in the street but don't actually know. It was weird, she almost felt as if she had seen him before…as if from a long lost dream.

She's snapped from her thoughts by the familiar call of, "Mummy!" as her son ran towards her, arms outstretched and face flushed from running around the playground. A loving smile breaks across her face as she bends and catches him when he throws himself into her arms, laughing lightly at his giggles when she spins him in a circle, the strange man with the bow tie temporarily forgotten.

The Doctor took a few steps backwards, deciding he no longer wanted to be there and then he suddenly found himself standing back in The Library. Lost in thought, he slowly stepped over the threshold of the TARDIS, trudged up the stairs and plopped rather ungracefully into the jump seat.

She had forgotten him. He supposed it was some cruel trick of the data core…or maybe not so cruel. He had saved her to a place that was the complete opposite of everything she ever was. It was safe with no adventures to be had. He smiled slightly as her voice suddenly rang in his head, "Ever so dull," would be exactly how she'd put it. Maybe saved wasn't such a good word. Trapped was more like it. Yes, trapped was exactly it. He had trapped her in yet another prison, except this time there was no way to escape.

He pulled out his TARDIS-blue book that fit perfectly in the inside pocket of his jacket. It was filled with the best memories of the greatest story that would never be told. He smiled sadly at how full and how oh so old it was.

As he leafed absently through the worn pages he realized he wasn't ready to accept that he would never add to this book again; he would find a way to save her, properly save her. He paused on one of the pages and smiled sadly again- Picnic at Asgard.

_After their moon-lit picnic they lied down on the blanket that was sprawled out on the grass and gazed up at the stars. The Doctor smiled as River rested her head on his chest and intertwined his fingers with hers._

" _Can you imagine what it would be like to have a normal life?" he asked quietly._

" _You mean a life without half the universe after our heads? I'm sure it would be incredibly boring, my love." He could practically hear the sarcastic smile that played across her lips._

" _Seriously…imagine…just you and me. We could have a house, a properly normal house with a porch, complete with rocking chairs where we could sit and grow old together."_

_River smiled slightly at the thought. "We could have a big kitchen with a bay window that overlooks a garden."_

" _Big kitchen? Why would we need a big kitchen? You practically murdered dinner the last time I let you make it."_

" _Oh shut up." She smacked his chest playfully as he chuckled lightly._

_They spent the next hour perfectly painting the picture of a dream that would never come true._

_There were a few minutes of silence, both getting wrapped up in the thought of this alternate world. River spoke up again, "And maybe there would be the pitter-patter of little feet running into our room at night after having a bad dream."_

_The Doctor absently played with one of her rebellious curls. "…Children?" His smile grew wider at the thought. "I'd think I'd like that."_

" _I think I would, too…but I suppose all of this is just the one adventure we can never have…"_

_The Doctor could hear the sorrow lining her voice and he wrapped his arms tightly around her, wanting to tell her that one day they would be able to have all of that and more, but he wasn't in the mood for Rule One. They remained silent after that, staring up at the stars, both knowing the other was silently wishing for the adventure that never could be._

The Doctor shut the blue book and closed his eyes. Images of River in the data core flashed through his mind; she had seemed so happy. The data core had caused her to forget her previous life and she was able to carry out the life he knew she constantly dreamt about, even if she would never admit it.

He was a selfish old man and he knew it. He wanted to bring her back to him and travel with her for the rest of his days, but even more than that did he want her happiness, even if it meant that she didn't have a clue who he was, and maybe it was better that way.

He had always wanted to give her the adventure they never would, never  _could,_  have, and this, he supposed, was his chance.


	2. Chapter 2

_She fired her gun behind her, her red heels clicking against the concrete floor as she ran. She glanced at the man running beside her and smiled as he took her hand. She looked ahead- almost there. The man snapped his fingers and the door to the impossible blue box swung open then closed once they were safely inside._

_They ran up the stairs and danced around the console, pushing buttons and flipping levers, neither missing a beat. Once the TARDIS was safely in the vortex, the man pulled her into a kiss that was only to be broken by the need for air._

" _I hate you," she whispered, her hearts still racing from the run._

_He smiled softly and brushed a few of her rebellious curls out of her face, "No you don't."_

" _It was_ supposed  _to be a date." She tried to sound upset, but her lips curved into a smile that instantly gave her away; what was a date without all the danger and the running, anyway?_

_He put one hand to his chest in mock hurt and led her down the stairs with the other. "I thought it was a wonderful date, thank you."_

_Their voices faded as they made their way down the corridor to their bedroom, hand in hand. The console room was silent yet again as the madman and his wife chose to lock themselves away from the universe for just one night- saving the world could wait until morning._

River slowly opened her eyes as her dream faded. She slipped from under the covers and shuddered when her bare feet touched the cold floor. She grabbed her spiral bound notebook from her bedside table and crept downstairs, the chill that hung in the house wrapping itself around her legs and causing her to shiver.

She flipped on a light, casting the room in a soft glow. She sat down in her chair, folded her legs under her and a pulled a pen from the spiral binding of her notebook. The notebook was blue, but not her favorite blue. Her favorite blue was the blue of the impossible bigger-on-the-inside box that crept into her dreams every night.

She leafed through the pages that held every detail she could remember of the dreams that never failed to interrupt her sleep. She turned to a blank page and stared at it unable to remember the beginning of her latest dream…or the end…and for that matter she couldn't really remember the middle so well either; it was all rather fuzzy.

She remembered the box and she remembered…running, yes, there was always an awful lot of running in these dreams. There was a man; there was always a man, always the  _same_  man. Why was it she could never remember what he looked like?

She tapped her pen incessantly against her notebook as she tried to remember something,  _anything_ , about him.

A bow tie.

Yes, he had a bow tie…not quite unlike the one the strange man at the park had worn, come to think of it.

Her breath caught in her chest as sudden realization hit her; that man was no stranger to her, he was the same man that visited her in her dreams every night and swept her away.

She could feel tears stinging behind her eyes and she closed them, the memories flooding back.

 _An astronaut suit._   _'Always and completely forgiven.'_   _Flirting. Running. A bow tie wrapped around her hand. 'Who else was I going to fall in love with?'_   _Soft kisses. Running. Cold bars of a lonely prison cell. 'Honey I'm home.'_   _Escaping. Running. Loving. 'You're acting as if we've never done that before.' Hurting. Running. Losing. An expedition to a silent, book-filled planet. Shadows. Running. 'Please tell me you know who I am.'_   _Lost._

When she opened her eyes she found herself lying on the floor, her notebook clutched her chest as she sobbed brokenly. How could she have ever forgotten  _him_?

River Song had never cried herself to sleep before, but tonight she did.

River woke when the first beams of light from the early morning streamed through the window and onto her tear-stained face. Her hearts were broken beyond repair and a lump of sorrow constricted her throat. She squeezed her eyes shut, wishing that this was all just a terrible nightmare and that when she opened her eyes she would be back in her warm bed,  _their_  warm bed, aboard the TARDIS.

Her eyes shot open when a man's voice snapped her from her thoughts.

"Hello, River."

She stood and took in the man sitting before her. Eyes glistening mockingly behind his glasses, eyebrow arched, and a forced smile that River hated with every inch of her being plastered across his face- Doctor Moon.

"Been dreaming again? Dreaming of the ancient time lord and his impossible blue box?"

She could tell he knew they weren't just dreams; those memories were her life and he expected her to just  _forget_? To just pass it off as a dream? Like hell she would.

She ground her teeth together and clenched her fists around her notebook, "I remember  _everything_."

He fixed her with an unsettling gaze that reached into the very depths of her soul and stood, his smile never faltering. He stepped towards her, now close enough for her to feel his rancid breath on her face as he spoke.

"And then," he pulled the notebook from her grip, "you forgot."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love reviews too much for words :)


	3. Chapter 3

Doctor Moon walked into his room and gently closed the door behind him, still holding one of the many notebooks River had filled with her memories over the years. He opened a drawer to his desk that contained all the other blue notebooks and threw the one in his hand in on top of the others. He sighed heavily at the sight of the ancient diary that lay towards the back of the drawer. It was the bluest of them all with its paneled cover, cracked spine and tear-stained pages.

It was his job to keep her and the others downloaded from realizing the fiction that was this world and he hated himself more for it with each passing day. He had to keep reminding himself that it was best for her not to remember anything about the selfish time lord who had left her here without a second thought as to what kind of hell this place would be for her.

* * *

River listened to the sound of Doctor Moon's retreating footsteps until she was sure he was gone. She had played it off well; the distant look and absent-minded smile had convinced him that she had indeed forgotten, but there was no way in hell she would ever forget her gangly, bow tie wearing, floppy haired, nostalgic idiot ever again.

She walked up stairs and quietly pushed open the wooden door to her son's room and flipped on the light. She stood in the doorway taking in the sight of the empty bed before walking over and picking up the teddy bear that lay there and hugging it to her chest. She felt the sting of tears behind her eyes as she tried to come to terms with the fact that none of this was real. The data core had attempted to fashion the perfect family for her in an attempt to fill an empty void, one that could only be filled by him,  _her_  doctor, the man who could sweep her away from all her troubles, make her melt with just one kiss and cause both her hearts to skip a beat when she looked into his eyes and saw his undying love for her.

They had wonderful, danger-filled adventures that always involved a lot of running, but her favorite moments were afterwards when they locked themselves away from all the chaos and didn't give a single thought to anything else but each other. When he thought her to be asleep he would whisper soft promises of his love to her and it was those moments that she kept with her when she was alone in her cold cell in Stormcage or in her painfully empty flat after her pardon. It was because of those moments that she never once felt lonely without him; she knew he would always come back…but now she wasn't so sure. Her hearts were weighed with loneliness and she wondered if he would ever come for her.

Forcing the thought from her mind she placed the teddy bear on the pillow and crossed the room to the door. She gave the empty bed one last glance, flipped off the light switch and closed the door.

Hearts heavy, River walked into her room and plopped down in the chair by her window that overlooked the unnaturally green lawn. She propped her elbow on the window sill and rested her head in her hand as she watched raindrops slide down the window pane; it wasn't until a few minutes later that she noticed a figure at the edge of the lawn that was slowly getting closer.

She jumped up and pressed her hands to the cold glass of the window, hardly able to believe what she was seeing. It was him, in all his tweed-clad, suspender-wearing, bow tie-sporting glory- her good wizard had come to save the day.

She ran from her room, the stairs a blur as she flew down them and out the door. The cold rain that attacked her body didn't faze her as she ran across the lawn towards him, the wet grass clinging to her bare feet.

When she finally reached him she threw her arms around his neck and had to force herself not cry as he wrapped his arms tightly around her waist as if he never wanted to let go. She didn't know how long they stood there, but by the time they broke apart they were both soaked to the bone.

It wasn't until then did she notice the silver gun he shoved into her hand. She looked at him for an answer, confusion playing across her face for a split second before she understood. " _Oh_ ," she breathed. He could tell she was about to protest but he cut her off before she had the chance to speak, "Just do it." His voice was soft, but commanding and when she looked into his pleading eyes she knew that she didn't have a choice and trusted that everything would be fine.

She took a few steps back, aimed at his right heart and pulled the trigger.

He staggered backward, but quickly composed himself and pulled her into a kiss as the energy of regeneration filled the air. The gold particles swirled around them as he transferred the energy to her, the warmth of it filling her completely and making her feel more alive than ever before.

When the energy died down and the kiss ended she opened her eyes to find herself back in the TARDIS. She looked at him, expecting to see a stranger standing before her and was surprised to see that he still had the same face she loved so much- she supposed it had something to do with the fact that one couldn't technically die in the data core, she didn't know and she didn't care- all she cared about was him.

She had so much she wanted to ask him, so much she wanted to tell him, but now wasn't the time for words as they held each other as if they were afraid that if one let go, the other would disappear- nothing else mattered except that they were together and that he, her doctor,her _husband_ , had saved her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading.
> 
> I love comments :)

**Author's Note:**

> Reviews make me happier than you can possibly imagine :)
> 
> (Story re-uploaded from my FF.N account)


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